I certainly won't argue with those who say my dad did little when I was growing up and wasn't there...well, he's here now and doesn't that count for something. I mean, to me, it takes a lot for someone to step up. It's not all roses but when it's good, it's good. I love him. He calls and checks on me, asks if we are okay, if we need anything, he worries about us and in some way helps me to worry less, he believes in me and even when he doesn't agree he will back me, of course, not without saying his piece but he is a dad. My siblings and I have led such dysfunctional family lives. We've each defined family in our terms and cultivated family units to hold dear and done so with having our bonds with one another strained. My brother and I see one another the most these days and a large part of that is I can see him at work. I love Whole Foods and he works there so, bam! Groceries and a family hello. I miss my sisters and my little brother. Many miles separate us all and so that means many dollars separate us all. I've thought many times that it would be so lovely to create a vacation with my siblings once a year, hang out and just be together, learn about one another and then embrace the individuals that we are and see how we can fit together as one.
I read Nicholas Sparks memoir several years back and it inspired me. His novels are very run of the mill beach reads but his memoir, it was special. It had spark (pun intended). He was candid and raw in his feelings and misgivings and the beauty of the intense trip with his brother ignited me. It instilled a dream in me that I can have that with my siblings. And I hope that one day we can.
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